Could You Be With Someone Who Earns Less Than You And Other Money Questions

Have you seen the money related conversation starter cards circulating in the social media lately?

It is the Financial Service Council NZ teaming up with Hatch investment platform who brings us these downloadable cards that each have a money related question to answer.

I thought I’d do a post series of personally answering a few of these questions in each post and inviting you to share your own answer to the same question in the comments! You can download your own set here.

Which do you enjoy more: earning or spending money?

This is a tough question, since I enjoy both!

Making money appeals to my ambitious side. Earning money makes me feel independent and powerful.

Also spending my own money doesn’t make me feel guilty at all. Most of the time, sometimes I regret silly purchases.

Whereas during those times when I wasn’t earning at all, or wasn’t earning much I hated asking my partner for money.

Even when it was going towards our daughter. And I never ever asked anything to spend on myself.

Not because my partner would refuse or be funny about it all, in fact he encouraged it.

But I just hated it. I come from a culture where stay-at-home parents are quite rare. Growing up all my friends had parents who both worked. I can’t name anyone whose mum (or dad) stayed home full time.

So to me, working and earning your share towards the family income is the norm and not being able to do that made me feel wrong and vulnerable.

I enjoy being able to buy things, but that is not why I enjoy earning.

As I’ve rambled and untangled my thoughts, I do think I enjoy the earning side more. Feeling powerful and independent is important to me and earning money makes me feel that.

Do you know how much you have in the bank right now?

Yes I do. In fact I check my bank accounts multiple times a day, nearly obsessively.

Like something would suddenly change in there.

And sometimes it actually does. My card details were stolen once and over $200 disappeared from my account. I noticed it within few hours of it happening, reported it, closed my card and disputed the payments.

Anyway, I have about $5,000 in personal savings, $6,500 in joint savings, our mortgage is about $194,500 and my sinking funds have about $800 in them put together.

Currently my emergency fund sits at empty because I took the money to book my birthday trip from there.

I have the money saved elsewhere, on a high interest rate savings account so I haven’t wanted to drop the balance of that yet to move it to my emergency fund account.

So yes, I do know how much I have in the bank right now, and at pretty much all times.

Could you be with someone who earns less than you?

Yes, I definitely could be with someone who earns less than me.

It actually is kind of in a twisted way my goal.

I’m very ambitious, and earning a good amount of money (or more than my partner) is kind of a manifestation of my success.

I’ve also watched how my mum is financially controlled by my step-dad, due to him out-earning her, and I never want to be in that position.

In our relationship, money is very separate, which is why earning money in general is important to me. Earning more will enable me to do things I want to do, like travel overseas.

I’m determined to get there, I guess we’ll see how my partner will feel about it when it happens.

For now he is maintaining that he would be fine with it.

You can find other questions from the conversation starter cards and my answers here.

I’d love to hear your answers to these questions in the comments below!